Finding a Voice

Saturday, March 29, 2008

arts to release nations: Tribe of One

Here is a video about some friends from Briercrest College who got a chance to sing and dance and paint for the release of the Eastern block nation of Kosovo. Rik Leaf is the main spokesperson. Kathy is the woman with long hair, one of the dancers. (Kathy & I were in tour choir together and lived together in BC for a year after college. I learned a lot about silence and worship from her. She is married to Bruce, guitar player, the guy with short dark hair. You can see him play in their video of Fly Away.)

Tribe of One, Kosovo documentary



Tribe of One morphs, always with Rik and his wife Zara at the hub. Here's a video of a recent performance. Ah ... sing and dance for the release of the nations!

Tribe of One, Underneath the Maple Leaf

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 9:48 PM 0 comments

Monday, March 10, 2008

freedom

Forget "Freedom Fifty-Five." I'm turning FORTY this week and I'm going to fly!

Here's a new template to celebrate it.

Mom and Dad are hosting a party for me on Saturday with music, poetry, stories, and quite a few friends and family members.

Since my calling is to Sing Release To Nations (www.siretona.com), instead of gifts, we are contributing toward the building of a music studio in Novi Sad, Serbia. The studio is being planned by the Kuranji family (pronounced ku-RAH-nee), natives of Serbia who immigrated to Canada and later went back for ministry. Parents Vera and Danny, have been missionaries there for nearly 2 decades. Their son, Filip, was miraculously healed of kidney cancer at age two. Now at 21, with a gift of music, he has a vision to bring Christian music to Serbia. He works full-time in the church in Novi Sad. The Kuranjis have been part of a special mission project through Strasbourg Alliance Women this year and donations are receiptable through them.

If you're interested in contributing to the music studio, contact me here.

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 9:25 PM 3 comments

Thursday, December 27, 2007

slightly wistful

I'm working my last shift at the Spiritwood Homecare office tomorrow. Feeling a bit wistful. Sure the work is not my calling, in the Paul Stevens vocational sense, and sure it's better money than what I'm making in Strasbourg/Duval/Nokomis these days, but those factors are not keys. Among other things, I got to work with good people and learned a lot about being located in a specific place. The timing was right and, as two of my coworkers often say, "Everything happens for a reason." They may credit the Universe, but I'd say God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit have a lot to do with it! :)

So, tomorrow marks the final passage into this new season in my arts career. Where are we going, Lord? Guess we'll find out ...

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 11:02 PM 0 comments

Thursday, September 06, 2007

remembering Liza Shum


A few days ago I received this announcement about my friend Liza Shum (from Hong Kong):

We are saddened to notify you that Liza, beloved wife of Patrick and mother of Samantha, has passed away on August 27, 2007 (Monday). Throughout her courageous battle with cancer, Liza was lovingly cared for and supported by many friends, former colleagues and relatives.

I cannot attend the funeral next Thursday nor the farewell service next Friday, but I can contribute to the memorial book. Here's my story:

I met Liza in Caronport, Saskatchewan, Canada in the late 1980s. She was in high school and I was in Bible college, but she was around my age. It's funny to remember how she lied about her age at first. She was enrolled in the high school because of her English and was much older than the other students. but we were living in the same dormitory. I had always been interested in China, so I made a point of getting to know her. We became good friends.

Liza spent her first Canadian Christmas with my family. She had never been around cats before, and when she heard our cat purring, she said, "I think he's angry!" During the Christmas vacation, my parents attended a funeral. We learned that Liza had wanted to go but was too shy to ask, which led to a conversation about death and dying and faith. Liza wasn't a Christian at this point. In fact, she didn't seem very interested and used to hide in her closet during chapel time at Caronport because she didn't understand it and she wanted more time to study.

In second semester, Liza was required to take the "Christian Ethics" course. One assignment was to take notes during the Spring Bible Conference. Because she was still learning English, we would both take notes, then I would give her mine so she could see what she missed. During one service we weren't sitting together because she had completed the assignment. Not taking notes, she was able to listen differently, and suddenly she understood the good news of Jesus Christ. Afterwards, a friend came running to find me, shouting, "Liza became a Christian! Liza became a Christian!"

Liza graduated from Caronport High School with my brother Jeffrey and participated in other celebrations with my family like my sister's wedding. She became very dear to all of us while she lived in Canada. After high school she moved to Regina to study in the university there. I remember visiting and eating congee with Liza and her roommates. She got her driver's license in Regina and had some trouble learning to drive on snow and ice, with at least one car accident!

After Liza moved back to Hong Kong, we stayed in touch through email. I remember the wonderful news that she would marry Patrick, a Christian man who also had lived internationally. It was such a joy for me to know that Lisa's faith continued to grow. Of course it was double joy to learn the Liza and Patrick had become parents to darling Samantha.

The last time I saw Liza was June 1998 when I visited another friend in Hong Kong. It was delightful to meet Patrick and Samantha and their nanny, to see their home, to spend a day with Liza and Patrick hiking at Shek O. Also, Liza was a very good driver by that time! Since then, we have only exchanged a few emails, but it was always good to say in touch.


My heart is so heavy to think about this terrible loss. Yet I am comforted to know that her faith was strong and we will see Liza again someday in heaven. My prayers go out to Patrick and Samantha as they learn to live again in Liza's absence.

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 3:40 PM 1 comments

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

new template, new post

Thanks for the nudge, Rachel. I have been pondering this post for a couple of weeks now, wondering how to summarize recent experiences, opportunities, and musings ...

Lethbridge: Conference


The Research in Religious Studies conference was enlightening. It was one of the most inter-faith experiences I have had. The first paper was a critique of gender and sexuality in the Left Behind series. The second paper was an explanation of how yoga tantric sex is used to achieve enlightenment. And the conference progressed from there!

It started Thursday morning and by Thursday afternoon I had written in my notebook: "What's the 'real' value of a conference such as this? Is it just SCR?"

Thursday evening we had a banquet, with speaker Dr. David Goa of The Chester Ronning Centre at Augustana University College in Camrose, AB. It was like he had read my notebook. He challenged us that students of religious studies have a public vocation, that our work is important because we are learning to listen to people of other faiths and cultures, we are learning to understand difference and not merely dismiss it.

Though his voice is gentle and his cadences poetic, he does not speak in the vaguaries that often accompany multicultural tolerance: he challenged us to make and keep commitments, beautifully setting his work in the ground of his own Orthodox faith.

"The best conversations come out of commitment on both sides.
So for me the ‘other’ was never somebody to be afraid of. They were always somebody whose face invited me to a great mystery."

My cousin Amy & I were tremendously heartened by Dr. Goa and approached him after the banquet. He asked what we were presenting. When I told him "oral histories of women from the early days of Briercrest" he said, "Oh, we're very interested in that sort of thing. Send me your paper. Maybe we can work together." Amy & I walked away stunned by the possibilities. So I sent him my paper and we ended up setting a lunch date for the end of my Alberta tour.

Calgary: Family

After the Lethbridge conference I went to Calgary until my next conference. I stayed with my brother Tom, his wife Lori, and their kids Jackson, Mackenzie and Emma. They're so easy to be with and it's so refreshing for me to be with my nephews and neice: to take some turns driving the kids to and from school, to have quirky conversations with them, to play board games and card games. (I don't know anything about Star Wars, but who needs information to provide a suitable foil in Star Wars trivia?)

I also got to watch all of season six of Gilmore Girls and the first DVD from season one! (I rarely watch TV and movies at home.)

I was able to connect with other family members, too: Aunt Sherry (who lives in Estevan and Regina) was in town visiting her daughter Brandi. I was able to spend a few hours with each of them. Uncle Bob & Aunt Lorrie were visiting Canada from Australia. I had already seen them for a couple of days in Spiritwood, but we were able to do lunch at the Kensington Pub with Tom, Aunt Sherry, Brandi, and U. Bob's daughter Kelly.

Note: the Kensignton Pub is across the street from Tom's shoe store, Stride ("Because you can't be comfortable in ugly shoes"). Now I've got my eye on a pair of John Fluevogs from the Operetta line.















My favourite thing about Operettas is the quotation on the bottom:

Hey Minstrel
Your Love Makes Me Sing!
Arise! Come! My Darling,
My Beautiful One, Come With Me.

A beautiful pairing of a lyric from "I Could Sing of Your Love Forever" with a verse from "Song of Solomon" -- and perfect for a musician.

Someday ...

In the meantime, I need to make a bit of money!

RED DEER: HOUSE CONCERT

During that week I did a lot of prep for the CACSD conference.

I also held my first house concert at the home of Pete and Audrey Winter in Red Deer. There were about 15 people, including Audrey's brother Gene Zacharias and his family. Gene is a long-lost college friend. We used to sit in the cafeteria and laugh our heads off together. We did laugh that evening, but we also had poignant fellowship. Gene and Sonja joining me to sing the last song together:

I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in his hands
He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And hears me when I call.

After the concert, the Zacharias family wrote in my notebook. Gene & Sonja's son, Seth, is a very good artist, so I asked him to draw something. "Okay," he agreed. "I'll draw what came into my head."

















What came into Seth's head was astoundingly prophetic. My middle name is Faye, which means fairy, and this year more than ever it has been meaningful to me. Wings are another meaningful theme, so the butterfly is significant. (The dragonfly and bee were added by Seth's sister Claire, along with the two fairies and the flower on the bottom right.) The peace lily is a symbol from a dream I had in April 2006, comforting me to be contented about not having children (... yet ...).

Seth is about 12. There is no way he could have known these things, but on the evening of my very first house concert, these images were like Noah's rainbow: symbols of promise, affirmations that I'm on the right path.

Claire's other illuminations:












This bird reminded me of "Mother Bird" from a lovely book my friend Lamb gave me for my birthday this year: Fairy Dust and the Quest for the Golden Egg.

Funny -- I have these hand drawings, but I don't have any photos from the house concert!

We put about 15 CDs and a "tips teapot" on a low, round table in the middle of the living room. Instead of actually "selling" the CDs, people could just take one and put a donation in the teapot.
The amount in the teapot was approximately equal to the amount I would have collected if I had actually sold the discs. Again, a confirmation that the Lord will provide as I continue on this path.

On Wednesday afternoon I had my first phone interview with Incubator Records. Very encouraging.

Calgary: Open Mic Night

In order to have time together, my cousin Brandi & her husband Alex generously let me tag along on their "date night." I was planning to sing during open mic at The House Coffee Sanctuary, so we rendez-vous'd there. The wait for my call was going to be long
so we went for a walk through Prince's Island. Brandi & Alex left before 10 to pick up Aunt Sherry at the airport. I went back to The House, sang my two songs to a warm crowd, and ended up having a long and delightful conversation with a girl named Beka who had lived at Caronport for a few years after doing the Kaleo program. I left a CD and came away with a tentative booking for July 7th!

Calgary: CACSD Conference

The CACSD Executive started arriving on Sunday afternoon. We gathered that evening at Calgary's downtown Sandman for last minute planning. The conference started Monday afternoon and ended Wednesday evening. Using open space technology to organize the conference, I was the main facilitor. Open space is a great way to discover what's really important to a group, and one things we discovered is that excursions are important to CACSD members! We worked hard in discussion sessions on Monday afternoon & Tuesday morning. Tuesday afternoon was also open for sessions, but instead of posting topics, we ended up with invitations for sight-seeing and shopping!

Tuesday afternoon my friend Lamb arrived in Calgary and stayed at Tom & Lori's. (He drove from Ontario and has some business in Alberta this week.) Arriving about half an hour before me, he was entertained by Emma, who told him all about Charlotte's Web after learning that he had neither watched the book nor seen the movie.

Unfortunately, after supper I became quite sick and was completely wiped out through the next day. Missing Wednesday morning of my conference didn't really buy more time with Lamb since, both exhausted (him from driving and me from illness), we went to bed early and slept until 11:00 a.m. Even so, it was nice to spend some time with him. There's a good chance that he'll stop in Spiritwood next week on the return drive to Ontario.

I went back to the conference on Wednesday for a couple of afternoon meetings and the banquet and to help the Executive clean up. Job well done. Next year at Redeemer University College in Ontario.

Edmonton: Lunch with Dr. Goa

Had a lovely lunch with Dr. David Goa at the Mill Creek Cafe. We discussed my research on women from the early days of Briercrest and how to continue it, possibly with the Chester Ronning Centre. He gave me some very useful tips re. a Ph.D.

Ater lunch introduced me to The Bookseller, a used book store underneath the Mill Creek Cafe.
Lovely shop, well worth visiting again. Didn't buy any books, though!

Post-trip pondering


I came straight home to Spiritwood on Friday evening. Waiting for me was the first package from Incubator Records with 4 hours of workshop on cassette tapes introducing prospects to Incubator's approach to ministry. I like what they're saying so far but ... lately I've been wondering if I should find a day job. The idea of a steady income is appealing. The entrepreneurial life of a musician and researcher can be risky. But what am I "called" to? Incubator President, Nathan L. Sakany, says that a calling is "something that just keeps calling to you." Even if I took a day job for just a year or two, the music and research would "just keep calling to me." And the Lord keeps reminding me that he'll take care of the money.
So why not now? I need to stay centred and reread my own words from last summer: a new season.

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 2:35 PM 2 comments

Sunday, March 25, 2007

ladybug on the piano

LADYBUG

Last night there was no freeze, so today the air felt quite warm and fresh from the start. The sun has been shining and the snow has been vanishing all day, flooding some corners of our little town in every way. The loveliest sign of spring was a ladybug on the piano keys in church this morning.

She like the bass clef best and I tried to play around her, knocking her off only once. She flailed upside-down on the little ledge in front of the keys until I rescued her on my fingertip.

Ladybug! Ladybug! Fly away home.

Your house is on fire. And your children all gone.

BIRTHDAY

As of March 12th I am now officially "39 and holding."

I was amazed at how many people remembered on the day and emailed or phoned. Of course Lamb, who shares the day, called and we sang "Happy Birtday to us."

I worked at the homecare office and worked on my thesis most of that evening (the deadline was looming), but stopped for a simple, tasty supper, with the most unique "cake" ever. I've almost entirely eliminated sugar and wheat from my diet, so Mom called forth her endless creativity to design a visual feast in this original meat pie. She used some wheat-free crepes as "crust" with a quinoa-and-meat filling in the middle, and decorated it with sour cream, salsa, shredded cheddar, red bell peppers, Spanish onions, and a plastic cake topper. Brilliant. And very tasty, especially with extra Spanish onions!

birthday meat pie, detail

THESIS

Carol: yes, the thesis IS done, which makes the spring weather seem all the brighter! Dwayne Uglem likes it so far and has made some suggestions for "substantive changes," so it's a good thing we postponed the defense. In addition to rewriting, maybe I'll even get my taxes done before leaving for 'Port!

The thesis was too big to email to my thesis readers, so I posted it on a webpage for them. I'm not quite ready to give out the URL--one day soon after the April 9th defense. Looking forward to unveiling it!

Enjoy the springtime!

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 7:37 PM 1 comments

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Christmas week with the family

The single siblings have gathered with our parents.
The married-with-children siblings will arrive on the 27th and 28th.
My Korean friend, Annie, is also here for the week.
She's a student at Briercrest Seminary, where she's training for missions work.

Full house.
Fun house.

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 12:10 PM 0 comments

Thursday, November 09, 2006

a long shortcut

I'm in Winnipeg right now for some student development meetings. Had a big adventure flying from Saskatoon to Winnipeg yesterday. Was supposed to fly direct on an 8:00 a.m. flight, but the blizzard was so bad we couldn't get off the ground, so they let us off the plane for about an hour & a half. Unfortunately, after they loaded the plane again, they couldn't shut the door properly because there was so much ice that it broke the seal on the door! So we got off again and had to go rearrange our flights. A lot of people got refunds from Air Canada and went over to Westjet. Since my meetings weren't actually until today, I was in no hurry, so explored my options with Air Canada. The next direct flight to Winnipeg was full. What about rerouting through Toronto? Yes, that could work. There was one flight to Toronto at 12:30 pm landing at 5:15, with 4 options for connecting to Winnipeg. So I chose the 8:00 connection and called a couple of friends (Bonita & my dear Lamb) to meet me for supper.

Everything was incredibly backed up in Saskatoon. As we Air Canada customers waited for our very delayed 12:30 flight, we heard the West Jet attendant announce over the intercom: "You're probably wondering, 'Where's my plane?' Well, I'm wondering the same thing." Unfortunately, it was so stormy in Saskatoon that the airport staff were having trouble keeping the runway cleared off (and the planes de-iced and the baggage loaded), so the Westjet flight was circling and circling. The WJ attendant assured the travellers with connections to Ottawa that Customer Care had decided to hold the plane for them in Toronto. A few minutes later the WJ attendant came on again with not so reassuring news: the plane was running out of fuel and couldn't keep circling, so was flying to EDMONTON to refuel! So much for switching to Westjet!

Good thing I didn't choose the 6:00 connection as my flight didn't leave Saskatoon until about 2:30 or 3:00 and we landed in Toronto around 6:40. That left just half an hour with my friends. Bonita was at the arrivals door to meet me and we immediately went upstairs to the Starbucks near departures to save rushing at the end of our visit. Lamb was nowhere to be seen, so I didn't know if he would be there. My cell phone rang as we were ordering drinks. It was an 888 number -- Lamb's calling card? Sure enough, there was his voice: "Hellooo! Where are you?"

I said, "We're at the Starbucks near the departure gate." Turning around to scan the area I asked, "Where are you?" and immediately saw him on a payphone about 100 feet away. "I see you!" I squealed, shutting off my phone and running to hug him at the same time.

We had only about forty minutes, but it was time in person that we wouldn't otherwise have had. What a gift so spend time with two very dear friends -- all made possible by mishap after mishap on a very long day. I know other travellers will not feel so positive about their delays, and many people are frustrated with both Air Canada and Westjet now, yet I couldn't help wondering what other divine encounters were had like me.

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 10:09 PM 0 comments

Sunday, October 22, 2006

so much news ...

Wow -- has it really been a month and a half since my last post? So much has happened. I wrote a very long post already, but one false move wiped it all away. When will I learn to copy such things to the clipboard before navigating to another window??? Here are highlights from the past 6 weeks and some previews of things to come ...

- found some needed rest. Need now to establish some good rhythms -- too many late nights already! Mom and I are night owls.

- set up a website that I'm ready to launch: www.siretona.com.

- spoke at a college & career retreat in Alberta for a group from Brentview Baptist (Calgary). My friend Lamb came from Ontario to help with that. Really good weekend. Sold a few CDs.

- gave a Norwex demonstration at Caronport on Thurs., Oct. 12th. Seemed like quite a good show. One of the bookings will be down the road in Mortlach, and the other booking is happening right now -- a catalogue show in California! (With the free Westjet flight from my new Scotia Bank One account maybe I can fly down and follow up in person!)

- led worship with Mom, Aunt Linda, & Dawn Mundell for a ladies' retreat at Arlington Beach Camp last weekend. Wrote my first song of this new season. The speaker, Janice Dearing, had written the words and showed them to my Mom who handed them to me. I looked at them Saturday evening and woke up the next morning with an idea, picked up my guitar, and the tune came quite easily with a little tweaking to make the words into lyrics. I recorded (sketched) it on my cell phone and later was listening walked onto the stage. Gave the women a good laugh explaining why I was on the phone!

- left the retreat a bit early to attend the memorial service for my friend and colleague, Shantelle Almeida. Can hardly believe she's gone. I was on MSN Messenger with her just a couple of weeks ago. She received a clean bill of health at the end of August -- not a trace of cancer in her body. Then an aneurysm took her a few days after Thanksgiving. Life is but a breath. Sigh. Shantelle may have been "promoted to glory," but her loved ones are left to cope without her ...

- stayed in Caronport until Wednesday morning. Started feeling unwell on Monday at noon. Resisted it at first, then sensed the Lord telling me that with the busyness of the previous week my body and soul needed time to rest and shift gears. So I relaxed into it and took the afternoon off. Visited some friends that evening. Tuesday morning I asked the Lord to organize my day, bringing the right people across my path at the right times, and he sure did that. Of course there are people I couldn't see or spend much time with, but overall I was satisfied with the trip.

- have been finishing books. I'm a great nibbler, reading a chapter here and there, with not much fiction in my literary diet. But with the new space in my life I've been reading books from cover to cover. So far I would highly recommend all of them. On Saturday I finished A Town Like Alice by Nevil Shute, set in England, Malaya (aka Kuala Lumpur), and Australia. It was so compelling I didn't want to put it down and so beautiful I never wanted it to end. Apparently the movie is well done, so I'll borrow it and other books by Shute from the local library. Of course, now I want to go to Australia. In early September I read For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn and found it quite illuminating on the subject of men.

- got in on the beginning of a book sale at the library on Wednesday morning! Life couldn't be better. Discovered a copy of For Women Only (with study guide in it) at the Briercrest library sale -- for only one dollar! Also discovered a copy of Sealed Orders by Agnes Sanford for only 25 cents. Loved this book when I first read the library copy, then found a used copy somewhere, then lent it to my cousin Denise and haven't received it back yet. Now Denise can keep a copy and I'll have my own again.

- spent Wednesday afternoon in Regina with my cousin Marilou (lunch) then my Aunt Sherry (coffee & dinner). Stayed that night in Saskatoon with Janina and saw Melanie the next day before coming back to Spiritwood.

- wrote a c.v., collected some references, and have applied for some jobs in the area of arts and culture. We'll see what comes of it. I've registered with www.elance.com and would like to try bidding on some of the jobs there. Funny -- feel a bit daunted by that!

- need to finish the bulk of my thesis by November 7th. Brad Doerkson, the librarian at Caronport, has been more than generous with my due dates, but Nov 7th is my cut off! Tough to go from two month borrowing terms and unlimited renewals as a faculty member to two weeks as a seminary student, with only 3 renewals allowed. Will have to set the fiction aside for a bit ...

- tomorrow 8 or 9 Briercrest students will arrive to help with outreach at Witchekan Lake First Nation. In August Mom and Dad hosted a summer missionary with Child Evangelism Fellowship to do 5-Day Clubs in local towns. Mom had Witchekan on her heart for this, and when she made inquiries the doors opened more easily than she could have imagined. Then, wouldn't you know it, the missionary, Jennifer, was a First Nations girl from Prince Albert! They held clubs in 3 towns and on the first day had no kids in Spiritwood, about a dozen kids in Leoville, and about 37 at Witchekan. By the end of the week they had 98 people on their contact list including 3 moms and 5 teens. So the Briercrest team will help us with follow-up, holding an after-school club for kids and some noon-hour and weekend activities for teens.

Well, that's an update for now. I'll try to be better ... but don't hold your breath. Seems like it's feast or famine on this blog!

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posted by Colleen McCubbin at 9:58 PM 1 comments